Dead Pelican declares Ted Cruz winner of New Hampshire Primary

My logic is rather simple.

I learned from Fox News that in any given caucus and/ or primary, the first place finisher is irrelevant and that third place is where it’s at.

Fox News declared victory for Marco Rubio because he finished third in Iowa.

According to Fox News, the second- best loser is the actual victor.

Who am I to question them?


According to Breitbart News, Cruz is now looking forward to Fox News giving him extened coverage for his 3rd place finish.

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